Ever since I can remember, I was a grape fan for most things. I liked grape suckers. I loved grape juice. Grape popsicles were my jam, as was grape jam. So grape Tic Tacs? No brainer; that was in my cart faster than you can say “duh.”
And they were inhaled even faster. I have this thing with mints. ‘Savor’ and ‘mints’ do not go in the same sentence in my vocabulary. The second my jonesing paws get on a package of mints, I inhale them like candy. But that’s another story. Actually, that was the story. The end.
Anywho, the cashier rang up my grape mints and said, “grape?” so incredulously, I figured she was one of those grape haters who was judging me for my inferior liking of fruit-flavored mints.
I felt the need to explain myself and my childhood affinity for grape-flavored things and to my surprise, she agreed. She said grape Kool-Aid was her favorite. Instantly, I felt a lifelong sisterhood bond to the Walmart cashier for her preference to grape drinks. Finally, someone who got it. It’s like she was my soul sister, ya know?
Then later, I went home and on a completely unrelated-to-the-mints incident, I got sick. Or maybe it was related, since I downed the entire pack of mints in about 2 minutes. Whatever. Anyway, I went looking for some medicine to assuage my newfound illness when I realized something: all adult medicine tastes like junk, but kids medicine tastes so delicious.
What. Is up. With that.
As a kid, I hated getting sick — but the silver lining was A) staying home to watch TV all day; B) alternating Scooby Doo episodes with half-assedly playing Barbies; and C) taking fruity-flavored cough syrup. If I do recall, I was most a fan of the orange Triaminic cough syrup which made oranges taste bearable, but because the world hates me, it was only for allergies. So I pretty much spent my childhood concocting fake allergy sicknesses just so I could take it. My mom quickly quelled that soon-to-be-drug habit and thus I never had a taste of the sweet orange nectar again. But I digress.
Now as an adult, taking medicine is almost as worse as the sickness itself. Why can’t medicine companies make our cough syrups and pills flavored? Why does everything have a medicine taste? Is it really that much of an imposition to add some cherry extract to my cough syrup, or would that like, cause the world to cave in upon itself? When you reach adulthood, does that mean you’re somehow not worthy enough of a decent-tasting medicine? Like your life isn’t crap enough, what with going to work sick, not being able to stay home to play Barbies or watch Scooby Doo marathons, and pay bills, now you have to take garbage-tasting medication?
Kids don’t pay bills. Kids don’t have to go to a 9-5 office job while sniffing their brains out. Kids don’t deserve all the fruity flavored cough syrup. It’s an outrage, really, and one I don’t intend on letting off until my medicine tastes like grapes and heaven-kissed oranges. I’M A TAXPAYING AMERICAN, DANGIT, AND I DEMAND FLAVORED COUGH SYRUP!
Anyway. While this has nothing to do with Cosmic Brownies, it does kind of. Because as a kid I would snack on those heavenly morsels of chocolate-fudge-frosted brownies while watching Scooby Doo, and as an adult I still snack on them (but while watching worse TV programming). Cosmic Brownies don’t discriminate — they taste awesome no matter how old you are, and they’re equal opportunist. They aren’t ageist and mean like medicine. So basically, eat Cosmic Brownies all the time is what I’m saying.
These Copycat Cosmic Brownies taste identical to the prepackaged counterparts and come together in minutes. The thick fudge ganache layer is my favorite, topped with a sprinkling of rainbow-colored chocolate bits that bring back nostalgia hardcore.
While they’re not grape-flavored, they’ll do. And I’m not sharing them with medicine companies until my allergy syrup tastes like Skittles.
*recipe adapted from Life Made Simple Bakes’ recipe
- ¾ cup (1 & ½ sticks) butter, room temperature
- 1 cup sugar
- ⅔ cup brown sugar
- 2 eggs
- 3 Tbsp heavy cream or milk
- 2 tsp vanilla extract
- ½ tsp baking powder
- 1 Tbsp cornstarch
- Pinch salt
- 1 & ¼ cup all-purpose flour
- ¾ cup unsweetened cocoa powder
- FOR FUDGE GANACHE:
- 1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
- ½ cup milk chocolate chips
- ½ cup heavy cream
- Rainbow-Covered Chips or Mini M&M's, for garnish
- Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Liberally grease a 13x9" baking pan with cooking spray and set aside.
- In a large bowl, cream together the butter, sugar and brown sugar with a handheld electric mixer until creamy. Beat in the eggs, one at a time, followed by the cream/milk and the vanilla. Meanwhile, in a separate large bowl, whisk together the flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, cornstarch and salt to combine.
- Gradually add the flour mixture into the butter mixture until a soft yet thick batter forms. The batter will be very thick! Spread the batter evenly into the prepared pan using a greased rubber spatula to help keep it even. Bake for approx. 15-18 minutes or until the top is shiny and appears set. Do NOT over-bake! The brownies may appear slightly undone, but they will continue to set more as they cool. Cool the brownies completely in the pan.
- Once the brownies are cooled, make your fudge ganache. In a microwaveable bowl, combine the semi-sweet and milk chocolate chips and the heavy cream. Microwave for about 1 minute on HIGH power, then stir vigorously (careful not to burn yourself) to help melt the remaining chocolate clusters. Once the ganache is smooth, pour it over top of the brownies in an even layer. Immediately top with the rainbow covered chips.
- Allow the fudge ganache to set briefly, about 15 minutes, before cutting into squares. Serve!
- NOTE: You can find the authentic Cosmic Brownies Rainbow Chips at craft stores like Michael's, Jo-Ann, etc. They're Wilton Brand.
Super rich, ultra fudgy and packed with chocolate flavor, these Copycat Cosmic Brownies are dare I say — out of this world! The combination of semi-sweet and milk chocolate chips in the ganache keeps it from being too sweet nor too bitter, and the fudge brownies have the perfect consistency. Dense, rich and chewy with that fudgy, stick-to-your-teeth consistency we all know and love. These are the ultimate!
Have a delish day!
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