When I was a wee little girl, I loved taking those stupid quizzes in teeny-bopper magazines. You know, the ones like: Will your crush ask you out? or Decode your personality based on your bangs! or dumb stuff like that. But oh my god, they were SOOOO accurate and believable to a little girl following a weirdly sketched diagram or adding up Bs. If I learned anything from those quizzes, it’s that I’m a gullible weirdo who likes predictable, impersonal quizzes to tell me stuff I already know.. or make up generic things that could maaaaybe apply to me.. or the 3247628348234 other girls taking the same quiz.
So now, I want to make a quiz because I feel that I have gained so much quiz-taking knowledge and would love to decode all of your personalities in the most impersonal way possible. So if you ever wondered about your inner psyche.. you’re about to find out ~*~*
Peanut Butter
If you like crunchy… you’re a free-spirit. No one can put a leash on your wild inner animal. You like the color chartreuse. You regularly get Justin Bieber songs in your head and you like it. You like Cocker Spaniels.
If you like creamy… you like to play by the rules. In fact, you love rules so much, you have an obsession with rulers. You have ones from 7 countries in Europe and you cherish them dearly. You have a deep fear of trampolines after your horrible cousin Ashley pushed you off of one when you were nine. You’re artistic.
Candy
If you like sour… whoa now, you’re totally a wild child! You were born in January, February, or the remaining 10 months. Your lucky number is 22. You have a secret love for expensive silk shirts.
If you like sweet… you are kind of a predictable person, but you have a weird side no one understands. You wear shirts under all your clothes that says ‘I Love Aaron Samuels’ and you know the difference between cheap, polyester K-Mart hair extensions worn by Shawana and the classy stuff.
Ice Cream
If you’re a chocolate person… you’re probably between the height of 4’11” and 6’1″. If you think back to all the people you’ve dated, most of their names start with the letter G. Yellow is your favorite color.. or maybe it isn’t, I don’t know you that well.
If you’re a vanilla person… you HATE when people call you ‘vanilla’. Don’t they know you’re so much more? What those people don’t know is you’re secretly planning a revolution and are making posters in your basement. You don’t know what you’re revolting just yet, but dammit you’re gonna do it. You won’t stand for being vanilla no’ mo’. People can’t judge you based on your ice cream preference. This is AMERICA.
If you’re a strawberry person… you’re probably the cool person everyone wishes they were best friends with. But sometimes you wish people would realize that after grueling days of being the popular person, you just like to go home, get into some pajamas, and interpretive dance in your living room to Enya. Sure, the world is your potato, but sometimes you just have to reconnect with the earth, you know?
Other Stuff
If you like flan/custard/bread pudding… you’re a confident, fearless leader. You’re not afraid to admit you like food that tastes like wet sponges. SO WHAT, BITCHES, you say as you throw up your sign. Wut wuuuuuuut. You also enjoy eating said flan/custard/bread pudding while being surrounded by geckos, spiders and while watching Toddlers and Tiaras because you’re not afraid of creepy things.
If you don’t like marshmallows… you’re probably soulless. That, or when you were a Girl Scout, your troop leader scared the friggin’ badges off of you when she mentioned that if you eat marshmallows too quickly you’ll straight up DIE because no one can save you when a marshmallow is lodged in your throat. Like, WTF morbid troop leader? We ain’t playin’ chubby bunny over here but now I’m like scarred from ever eating puffy sugar again.
If you like fruitcake… this is your gentle reminder that the year is 2013, and people only give other people fruitcake if they hate them. Also, you may want to have your doctor look at your tongue because you were probably born without tastebuds.
Anywaaaay, I hope y’all learned a lot about yourselves. And hopefully all of this deep soul-searching worked up your appetite because I brought the most badass dessert evahhhh. They’re slightly adapted from one of the awesome recipes in my friend Averie‘s book, Peanut Butter Comfort— her Six Layer Cookie and Marshmallow S’mores Sandwich Bars. When I saw these babies, I fell in LOVE. There’s something so magical about six heart-throbbing layers of sugary, buttery goodness, and something so comforting about the delightful combination of cookies and s’mores. So I used the same concept, but with an old friend: Biscoff. The result is kinda sorta mindblowing, and if you eat them, it pretty much means you’re awesome 🙂
- 2 (16 oz flat) pkgs refrigerated Oatmeal Scotchie cookie mix (if you can't find Oatmeal Scotchie flavor, substitute regular oatmeal or chocolate chip)
- 3 Ghirardelli Milk Chocolate + Caramel Bars
- 1 cup crunchy Biscoff
- 1 (7 oz) jar marshmallow cream/fluff
- ½ cup butterscotch or peanut butter chips (your choice!)
- Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Line an 8x8" baking pan with foil, extending the sides of the foil over the edges of the pan. Spray the foil with cooking spray.. seriously, the marshmallow will be super sticky, so take all the precautions you can!
- Press ONE (1) of the packages of cookie dough evenly along the bottom of the prepared pan. Top with the three chocolate bars. You may want to break up one of the bars to help cover the area of the dough, but try to cover it as much as possible.
- Spread the crunchy Biscoff spread evenly over the chocolate bars. Top evenly with the marshmallow fluff. Sprinkle with the butterscotch or the peanut butter chips (or try both!).
- Lastly, top the layers with the remaining package of cookie dough. To make this easier, there's two ways. I like ripping off chunks of the dough, flattening them in my palm, and gently laying them over one another evenly to cover the top of the bars as best I can. You can also lightly flour a flat surface and roll out the dough to form a slab, then layer it on top. As long as the cookie dough is evenly covering, you're good. And it's totally cool if some marshmallow peeks out!
- This pan will weigh approximately 87 pounds, so don't be alarmed. Haul it into the oven and bake for approx. 25 minutes. The center may appear slightly undone, but that's okay -- it will firm up as it cools. Do not overbake. Allow the bars to cool at room temperature about 1-2 hours, then refrigerate for an additional 2 hours to set up.
- Lift the overhang out of the pan and cut the bars into, well, bars. Serve!
Ronda says
I’m drooling as I look at these. And you are so right about me in every way.
tanya says
I need to find me some crunchy Biscoff!!! Lets see I learned that my taste buds must be fully functioning because I HATE fruit cake and that someone else agrees that pudding really does taste like crap and should NOT be considered dessert! These bars-no crap, phenomenal dessert!
Tieghan says
Amazing…..as always!! I want all these layer for breakfast!!
sally @ sallys baking addiction says
amazing Hayley. Totally drooling. All of your layered desserts are homeruns and I am dying for these! Biscoff + fluff. I love the way your mind works!
Kayle (The Cooking Actress) says
I loved those quizzes too! OHEMGEE YOURS WERE SO ACCURATE OMG I DIDNT EVN REALISE SO MANY THINGS ABOUT MYSELFF UNTL UR QUIZ TOLD ME SO
(:P)
I’m just….feeling redundant because all of the things I wanna say about these are so obvious. You know like how I’m in loooove. and how they’re AMAZING. and so YUMMYYYYY! and perfect in every way!
Sheila @ Sweet Bake Life says
This look so delicious! I will absolutely be making these! My kiddo will flip for them – and probably my hubby too!!!
Sarah @ Miss Candiquik says
LOL! Guess I wasn’t the only one gullible enough to take those dumb quizzes when I was in junior high!
btw, that font…PERFECT for your watermarks, it screams “Domestic Rebel”.
And these bars = holy canoli…
+ beautiful, drool-worthy photos!
Jennifer @ Not Your Momma's Cookie says
I remember those quizzes! Oh, and the teeny bopper magazines that they came in. Oh, JTT, I had to buy anything with your face on it…
These bars look so crazy good! I’m newish to the Biscoff bandwagon and oh my, I didn’t know what I was missing!
Faith @ Pixie Dust Kitchen says
I always took those quizzes as soon as I got those magizines in the mail! One of my friends at church had a bible with quizzes in them and I convinced my parents to buy me that bible because of the quizzes.
These bars look amazingly good! Biscoff + fluff + peanut butter + chocolate? SO good.
Pamela @ Brooklyn Farm Girl says
I will eat anything with Biscoff, nom nom nom!
Miss Messy says
Biscoff is my dream spread 🙂 I love it! This looks amazing!
Julie @ Julie's Eats & Treats says
We must both think alike! I made Biscoff for today’s post too! Although…since I finally popped that Biscoff cherry I MUST find crunch Biscoff now!
Nicole @ Young, Broke and Hungry says
I want them all!
Ashley @ Kitchen Meets Girl says
I hate to admit it, but I still take those quizzes now. 🙂
And I literally keep scrolling back up to look at/drool over that last photo with the marshmallow fluff oozing out – OMG. I want one of these right now – screw the diet.
kathyfitz says
omg sounds so yummy!!!
I hate to break it to you – but a woman here in MA actually did die from choking on a marshmallow in 2010.
http://boston.cbslocal.com/2010/10/28/9-1-1-dispatcher-response-questioned-in-womans-death/
Sarah | The Sugar Hit says
These look killer, I am on such a marshmallow binge at the moment. Give me three of these with some ice cream, I’m done.
Tabitha says
I really enjoy the stories you tell leading up to the recipes. I loved the take on the teeny-bopper quiz. So funny! I had so much fun reading through it all that I also forgot there was a recipe to look forward to. 😉 I think I will try this recipe with chocolate chip cookie dough. Also, where do you find biscoff spread? Is it in the vicinity of peanut butter???
Dorothy @ Crazy for Crust says
Um, you were kind of right on. Creepy! And I just finished Gone Girl, so this post made me laugh (the chick in the book wrote the quizzes for her job).
These bars. Holy heck woman, you rock!
Dru @ Teenage Cakeland says
I love the personality quiz! The answers are so great. And so are the bars!
tash @ the velvet moon baker says
OMG Hayley these look to good for words. I finally got a friend to send me a jar of the lotus smooth and it’s amazing think I may have to have a go at these sometime very very soon
Emily @ Life on Food says
I still like those quiz, not that I take them seriously but they are entertaining. These bars look amazing. I wouldn’t care what they say about me. I would be all over them.
Joyce says
These cookie bars look amazing. I will surely be trying them. Can you please tell me what size/weight these candy bars are, as well as who makes this particular cookie dough? Thank you!
thedomesticrebel says
Hi Joyce! I bought Ghirardelli brand chocolate bars, and unfortunately I don’t have the exact size for ya, but it’s the standard-size chocolate bar 🙂 hope that helps!
Nancy @ gottagetbaked says
Lmao. What does it say about me if I like ALL of those foods?! I’m having an identity crisis over here! Eating a pan of these six layer bars will make it all better. Did you ever have a mood ring? Those were really in style when I was in high school. I don’t know why but thinking about all those quizzes I did in all those teen magazines made me think of mood rings!
Melanie @ Just Some Salt and Pepper says
These look so so good. Mmmm, Biscoff.
Averie @ Averie Cooks says
Thanks for the shoutout! I didn’t get a ping or anything …. and was reading the recipe and thought, wow, this sounds like what I did in my cookbook. And then saw my name and book! Thanks for the linky love! and your bars look SO GOOD. Cookie butter, cannot go wrong! And all these awesome layers. Love it!
Liz says
No Biscoff here in Canada but luckily for me I’m headed to the States tomorrow to stock up on some! These looks INCREDIBLE! 🙂
Rose says
I’m a choc-a-holic who loves the color purple, FTW