The Domestic Rebel

Everyday Ingredients, Extraordinary Desserts

Birthday Cake Cannolis

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birthday cake cannolis stacked on a pink plateOh my gawwwwd you guys.

So, let’s be honest here.  In the last year or so, I have gained around 20 pounds.  No, that isn’t a typo.  Twenty. Friggin. Ell-Bees.  How and why are beyond my comprehension, but I’m guessing it’s because I’ve been far too friendly to french fries and ice cream sundaes.

And just so you know, french fries and ice cream sundaes are NEVER your friend.  They act like your friend, all yeah we can hang out and be friends but then they’ll betray you.  It’s a fact: they’re bad friends.  And while we’re on this note, maybe don’t befriend any food, because you’re probably seriously lonely if you consider food your friend.  However, I get it.  People suck and sometimes it’s just easier to tell that bag of potato chips how much you hate the human race.

Needless to say, with extra baggage now in tow, some of my clothes have been a bit on the tighter (or sadly, completely unfitting) side. I have resorted to hanging up my precious unfitting clothing in the pantry and kitchen so I remind myself that my arms now have arms of their own and having four arms isn’t a good look when wearing my Betsey Johnson cupcake dress so it’s proooobably a good idea NOT to eat those chicken nuggets.

And it’s been getting significantly hotter here in Sacramento, so I have been unable to get away with wearing my jeans in public.  Meaning, I have had to fight to hell and back to get my denim shorts on my muffin top’s muffin top’s muffin top’s cousin’s bitch of a friend.  I Jaws-of-Lifed my way into the shorts and wore them to work one day.

Everything was going swimmingly, and I had fully intended on cutting off circulation to my muffin top with the too-tight waistband when my muffin top got all uppity and rebelled.  I had been walking to my car when I heard tink tink.  I looked down and saw a button.  I picked it up and instantly recognized it from my double-buttoned closure on my shorts.  I stuffed it in my pocket for later.

When I got home, I walked through the door and was in the process of greeting Mannie when I heard tink tink.  I figured that pesky button had fallen out of my pocket, but when I reached for my pocket, I could feel the button tucked safe inside.  I looked at the ground and saw the second button to the closure, grinning menacingly up at me from its place on the floor, like haha you fatty, I’m free!  I’m FREE! Then I took a Klonopin because buttons talking to you is never a good sign.

So lately, I have been eating incredibly well, working out on the daily, and logging my calories into an online program so I can *hopefully* be on friendlier terms with my shorts again one day.

birthday cake cannolis stacked on a pink plate and dark backgroundHowever, diets are pointless if I can’t have a splurge now and then, so I choose my splurges wisely and definitely had to choose these cannolis when I made them!  Crispy shells stuffed with birthday cake filling?  Um, perfection!

You could say they’re button-popping DELICIOUS!

birthday cake cannolis closeup stacked on a pink plate

5.0 from 4 reviews
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Birthday Cake Cannolis
Author: 
Recipe type: Desserts
Prep time: 
Total time: 
Serves: 12
 
Celebrate deliciously with these festive Birthday Cake Cannolis! The traditional ricotta filling has a Funfetti twist, lending a unique taste to these tubular treats.
Ingredients
  • 12 premade cannoli shells
  • 1 container (approx. 1 & ½ cups) part-skim ricotta cheese
  • ½ cup dry Funfetti cake mix
  • ½ cup powdered sugar
  • ½ tsp EACH vanilla and butter extract
  • About ⅓ cup miniature chocolate chips
  • Rainbow sprinkles
Instructions
  1. First, use some bakers twine or ribbon to tie small bows around each cannoli shell, careful not to crack the delicate shell. Set the shells aside. Do this only if you want the cannolis to look cute. If you're just going to stuff your face, obviously twine is just another obstacle for you to overcome before scarfing them down. Omit as needed.
  2. In a medium bowl, combine the ricotta, dry Funfetti cake mix and powdered sugar with a handheld electric mixer until creamy. Add in the extracts to combine.
  3. Gently spoon the ricotta filling into a piping bag attached with an open star tip (I used Wilton 4B). Pipe the ricotta mixture into the cannoli shells. Sprinkle the ends of the cannoli with the mini chocolate chips and sprinkles. Stack & serve immediately.
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birthday cake cannoli with more cannolis in background on a pink plateY’all need to make these STAT!  You’re gonna love them!!

Have a delicious day!

xo, Hayley

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Comments

  2. Omg, I was already giggling at this post, because girl, I can totally relate. Then I read the part: “Then I took a Klonopin because buttons talking to you is never a good sign.” And I lost my shit. You are hilarious.

    I just got back on the “My Fitness Pal” tracker. It’s a good one. And these look so delicious and pretty for a splurge!

    Reply

    • Hahahaha thanks girl!! Damn those talking buttons. And I’ll have to look up My Fitness Pal! I need all the help I can get.

      Reply

  3. Sadly, I know the muffin top’s muffin top’s muffin top’s cousin’s bitch of a friend a little too well! When I see recipes like this though I just kind of think “Totally worth it if my pants dont fit”. They make bigger pants, right?

    Reply

  4. So cute and festive. Definitely going to have to give them a try. I love reading your blog. It always starts my day with a smile. Thanks Hayley!!!

    Reply

  5. Damn buttons! Stretchy pants are the way to go! I hear ya though Hayley! I’ve gained about 10 lbs since Christmas! Not thrilled to have to be wearing a bathing suit right now! Good for you for working so hard! I wish I could tear myself away from these spectacular cannolis so I can get up and do something myself!

    Reply

  9. “Haha, you fatty, I’m free!” – OMG, I totally laughed out loud! Those rude buttons 😉

    Unfortunately, all of my regular pants stopped fitting when I was like 10 weeks pregnant. I was like, seriously!? #pregnantladyfail

    At least I can have some of these cannolis…I mean, I’m pretty sure the baby NEEDS them.

    Reply

  12. Pesky buttons! You don’t need to loose weight, you need to buy shorts that don’t fall apart..haha. These cannoli’s sound as if they were made for me! Since it’s my birthday, I am gonna eat five of these cannolis without guilt.

    Reply

    • Do it! It’s your birthday and you can cannoli if you want to! And Happy Birthday, m’dear!! 🙂

      Reply

  14. First off, HOLY FLARGH! These cannoli are totally ridicky – like, COMPLETELY. They would make a great fairweather friend, I don’t care. Second, I think I laughed through this post a million times, then totally cried because I can so relate, although I think you look perfectly lush! XO

    Reply

  19. Oh man now you’re making me think about how I’ve gained weight too *sigh* maybe I should break into Michael’s klonopin 😛

    I love how you’ve come over to the cannoli side so entirely like ummm YUM

    Food is my friend. I don’t care if it’s a frenemy, I love it.

    Reply

  21. I’ve actually gained a few pounds recently as well (the summer gives me WAY too much time to bake and inhale food lol) and I was going to try and be good in the future but….
    then you post these freaking cannolis! DUDE how am I supposed to say no to these babies?!

    I both love and hate you at this moment, Hayley. 😛

    Reply

  25. Love your blog! You made me laugh out loud whiles reading this…what pill can I take for that? About this weight gain, does no one consider how much we taste test as we experiment and bake? I am attending college for my baking/pastry degree, and let me tell you….it’s not just the weight gain I worry about..it is the sugar high I get!! Does not bode well for my diabetes that I want to become a pastry chef. :). Ah well, sacrifices must be made…guess I have to skip dinner!

    Reply

  30. Lol!! You crack me up!!! Summer months are to blame because they are the beasts that remind us about our weight gain. And I don’t care if I gain a few ellbees after having that entire batch of your cannolis. They look amazing!

    Reply

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