Let’s talk embarrassing moments, shall we?
Contrary to the fact that my cheeks flush a tomato red 50% of the day, I’m not really embarrassed by much. I have that ability to laugh off something mortifying or crack a self-deprecating joke without feeling like I need to crawl into a hole and go into Witness Protection.
I mean, everyone eventually walks out of a bathroom with toilet paper on their shoe, shoots snot from their nose while sneezing, trips in front of a hot person, or makes an inappropriate sexual innuendo at some point in their life, right?
(Or am I just a walking target for humiliation, especially on the latter of that list?)
However, there came a time in my life where even the most self-deprecating joke couldn’t be cracked. Where even the deepest hole couldn’t possibly be deep enough. When even Witness Protection looked at me and chuckled, “I’m afraid you’re screwed.”
And it was on live television.
SOOOOOO. A couple years ago, my mom had the day off and instantly, whenever my mom has a day off, I want a day off too. Because everyone knows that when moms have free time, they automatically do fun stuff like get pedicures or go shopping or take you out to lunch (or is that just my mom?) It also happened to be the day the new Sephora store was opening in our local mall.
Supposedly, the first 100 people in line for the grand opening would receive mystery gift cards containing anywhere from $10-500 or something like that. And that was basically plenty incentive for me to call into work, cough into the receiver, and complain I was too sick to come in that day. Meanwhile, I was feverishly getting dressed and jumping into the car to head to the mall and get in line.
So Mom and I were first in line for Sephora. We were minding our own business when suddenly, a camera appeared out of the corner of my eye. And the perky newslady from our local station was approaching us. Maaaaybe it was because my Mom and I had been standing there for several hours, or maybe it was because I was hot and itchy in this ill-fitting blue sweater, or maybe it was because I had called in sick to work and even though I actually was ill and had a scratchy voice, I don’t think my boss would approve of me on live TV standing in line for a store opening when I was supposed to be nursing my cold.
But whatever the reasons were, I had no time to think before her microphone was shoved in my face and she asked, “why are you SO excited for Sephora to open up in the mall?!”
This was it. Life or death. There was a mike in my face and the whole world (okay, all of the Sacramento area) was watching. ME. My face. But it’s cool, because I’ve always been pretty good on my toes, and I figured I could swing this. I opened my mouth and out came a weird, scratchy frog voice:
“I am SO excited for Sephora to be in the Galleria because it’s amazing! It’s a makeup mayhem!!”
And that was it. I did it. I said “makeup MAYHEM” on live TV. While sounding like a beast. While pretending to be sick from work. While wearing a gross sweater.
Makeup. Mayhem.
Nooooot even the right word, Hayley. Good job.
Hoping I could recover from sounding like a croaky, scratchedy, illiterate beast on TV, I prayed no one watched the news. However, when I visited my Facebook page a little later, I didn’t escape fame unscathed. Ohhhh no, there were plenty of remarks from friends and family talking about my appearance on the news. And my voice. And my, er, choice of words.
Okay. So I know that this isn’t the most embarrassing thing ever, and I’m sure some of you are reading this like, “she thinks THAT is embarrassing? Girl ain’t seen nothing yet“, but the culmination of guilt, a bad choice of sweater, sounding like if Dobby had a frog in this throat AND saying “makeup mayhem” on live television just kind of set me up for embarrassment fo lyfe.
I kinda just wanted to dive into a deep pool of Toffee Snickerdoodle Dip, so I kinda sorta did. Yeah, okay, I did so YEARS later .. but still, it made me feel better 🙂
This dip is insanity, people! It tastes like a snickerdoodle cheesecake, swirled with little buttery toffee studs throughout its creamy, ooey goodness. Literally addictive! And it makes for the perfect hiding spot after something particularly mortifying.
Toffee Snickerdoodle Dip *dip base from Something SwankyÂ
- 1 pkg (8 oz) cream cheese, softened to room temperature
- ½ cup butter, softened
- 3 Tbsp brown sugar
- 1 cup powdered sugar
- 1 & ½ tsp vanilla extract
- 1 tsp cinnamon
- 1-2 tsp sugar (for taste)
- About ½ cup crushed toffee bits, plus more for garnish
- In a medium bowl, beat together the cream cheese and butter with an electric mixer until creamy. Beat in the brown sugar and vanilla to combine. Lastly, add in the powdered sugar, ½ cup at a time, until the dip is creamy and smooth. Stir in the cinnamon, sugar, and toffee bits by hand.
- Pour the dip into a decorative bowl and garnish with additional cinnamon sugar and toffee bits, if desired. Serve with sliced fruit (apples are perfect!), cookies, crackers, or a spoon!
Â
I love how warm and cozy this dip is — snickerdoodles are the ultimate comfort cookie, aren’t they?! The cinnamon and sugar swirled throughout this tangy, creamy cheesecake dip is superb. And I love the little crunchy bits of buttery toffee. They add that perfect contrast in texture with a nice little crunch. You’ll love this dip!
Have a delicious day!
xo, Hayley
Tanya Schroeder says
Make up Mayhem, thats great Hayley! Oh well, we all have moments where we wish we could take something back, no granted we usually aren’t on tv! Kidding. I do love the idea of a snickerdoodle dip! It could dangerous though, I could probably eat it with a spoon for breakfast
A Sweet Baker says
This would be a perfect dip to lose yourself in…especially after an embarrassing moment on TV! Just think….no one probably even remembers it! 🙂
kelly @ Hidden fruits and veggies says
This recipe sounds great! I don’t have any recent embarassing moments I’m trying to get over, but I think I deserve to make it anyway 😉
Jess @ On Sugar Mountain says
Bahahahaha but I like makeup mayhem. That’s exactly what Sephora is like all the time in my mall. 😉 And it’s okay I fell last semester just simply walking on the sidealk – glasses flew off, coffeee mug rolled away down the road, and a woman with her kids just stared at me like I must’ve been on drugs or drunk lol. It happens 😀 Though if I had this dip to console me afterwards I would’ve been in much better shape!
Elaine says
I don’t need an embarrassing moment to want to dive into this glorious dip. But a few bowls of this would certainly come in handy immediately after embarrassing moments. And don’t worry, you aren’t the only one who somehow finds herself in the most awkward/embarrassing moments!
bakerbynature says
I want to dip my life into this! Uh huh. I do.
[email protected] says
it’s almost worth it to have an embarassing moment so you can sink yourself into this dip just to make things better 🙂
crunchycreamysweet1 says
This dip is dangerous! I am going to eat the whole thing for sure! For sure sure! 🙂
ashley says
I have so many embarrassing moments i wouldn’t even know where to begin. I’m just one of those people that “things” happen to. Oh well! This dip sounds like heaven to me…
Nicole @ The Marvelous Misadventures of a Foodie says
Hahah I love that you said makeup mayhem! Seriously best.phrase.ever
Toffee is like heaven and I want this dip. I pretty much want to devour anything with the word toffee in it at any given time.. rawr
Nicole @ youngbrokeandhungry says
Makeup Mayhem is totally the correct word to describe Sephora. All those woman fighting over eyeshadow and lip liner, its a madhouse! But if getting embarrassed means a huge tub of this dip, I will willingly stick toilet paper to my shoe!
crazyforcrust says
This dip…I want to swim in it. And I agree with Nicole – Makeup Mayhem is totally Sephora!
Aimee @ ShugarySweets says
You had ME at toffee. OMG yummy!!
Back for Seconds says
Hahaha! That’s pretty funny 🙂 I love your stories.
This dip is totally happening at my house this weekend. It looks awesome, Hayley! Toffee AND snickerdoodle? Yum!
cookingactress says
Ahhhh embarassing moments, yepp yepp I’ve had many but…like you-usually I don’t really care and just laugh at it.
But ohh you poor thing! I bet that news business wasn’t as awful as it seemed, I like that you said makeup mayhem!
Georgia | The Comfort of Cooking says
Oh my lordy! This dip looks dangerous!
Christi @ Love From The Oven says
Yum! I could go for a bowl of that. And a spoon. 🙂
noyomoco says
I love your stories 🙂 I’ve never had the pleasure of being on TV…and I’m perfectly happy for it to remain that way!
lizwaterson says
MMmm this dip looks gorgeous. Like maybe I should take a few spoonfuls! I won’t lie when you said makeup mayhem- I thought whats wrong with that? I think it fits sephora- that little evil place I always spend at least $100!!
Heather @ Sugar Dish Me says
Moms totally do fun stuff on their days off! It’s like a cool mom thing. I used to LOVE dentist appointment days when I was in school because it was a guarantee that we would go shopping or sit down for lunch or get a pedicure.
Once when I was in high school and I was very busy cutting class in downtown Charlotte my friend and I got interviewed for some nonsense. It was hilarious.
Wish I’d had snickerdoodle dip.
Megan @ The Pink Flour says
This sounds amazing! And, I agree, Sephora really is makeup mayhem…I can get so overwhelmed in that place 🙂
Jocelyn says
I willing to risk public humiliation just so I can dive into a bowl of this goodness!!! You always make me smile 🙂