This year, I’m hosting Christmas dinner at my house. And this year, things are changing, my friends.
Gone are the Christmas dinners with scalloped potatoes from a box (yuck).
We said ‘sayonara’ to eating prime rib, which seems to be a cut of meat that is 5% actual meat, 95% inedible fat.
And Cool Whip ambrosia? Get. Out.
For this year’s meal, I wanted to make a turkey–my first time!–and simple things, like really creamy mashed potatoes, a yummy apple and sausage stuffing, the classic green bean casserole, and maybe a couple pies. Nothing fancy, nothing boxed (shocker!) But in order to make dinner a success, I had to practice. Enter: Practice Christmas.
Practice Christmas happened this past weekend and it was my first time roasting a turkey. Or touching a raw turkey. Or, um, molesting a turkey, since they make preparing that bird one of the most shameful and awkward things one has to do.
I mean, really.
While prepping the bird, I read that both the neck and giblets needed to be removed from the turkey prior to roasting. As this naked, glossy bird sat in front of me, I stared in the hind cavity with disgust, said a brief prayer (and apology to the bird) and stuck my hand in there hesitantly, as if this particular turkey had like, mutant, flesh-hungry fangs inside of it that would rip my hand off.
But I could not–for the life of me or my hand–find the damn neck or giblets. And I sat there, elbow-deep in this turkey feeling very much like a vile human being, as I blindly tried to feel around inside this poor animal for the damn promised neck and giblets.
Alone, miserable and disgusted, I did what any right-thinking person would do. I ran over to my neighbor’s house and begged her to “please help me find my turkey’s giblets! I can’t find them anywhere.”
My neighbor, probably suspecting I was going to ask for an egg or something, seemed shocked to be asked to participate in a turkey benecking, and said okay (note to self: I have an awesome neighbor). Together, we assaulted that turkey and finally found those pesky giblets, and after much tug-of-war, I finally–gruesomely–ripped out a neck.
And it was then I decided that there has to be a better way to do this. Turkey companies, do you hear me? DON’T MAKE ME MANHANDLE A TURKEY. At least make the rewards be worth it and not a bag of giblets which look like boy parts (ugh) or a neck (hardly a cool prize worth risking my hand for).
The end.
I’m sure my dogs who sat, unhelpful, as they watched me manhandle a turkey, could have used some popcorn for the show. Puppy chow popcorn, to be exact, even though this popcorn has A) no traces of actual puppy chow and B) cannot be consumed by dogs, but you get the picture.
When I saw a version of puppy chow popcorn on Sophie‘s blog, I knew I had to try it. It was so intriguing: classic puppy chow but with popcorn instead of Chex. Genius!! And since I am a firm believer in more is always better, I added crushed Oreos and Reese’s peanut butter cups.
Methinks, the perfect sign-off to Practice (or regular) Christmas.
Cookies n Cream Reese’s Cup Puppy Chow Popcorn *inspired by Sophie’s recipe HERE
- About 8 cups popped popcorn, kernels removed
- 5 squares white chocolate bark (like Candiquik)
- 1 Tbsp peanut butter
- About 1 & 1/2 cups Oreo cookies, coarsely crushed
- About 2 cups Reese’s mini peanut butter cups
- 3 squares chocolate Candiquik
- Powdered sugar
- In a large bowl, mix together the popped popcorn, cookies + peanut butter cups lightly. Set aside. Line a flat work space with wax paper.
- Meanwhile, in a medium bowl, melt the white chocolate candy according to package directions until smooth + melted. Stir in the Tablespoon of peanut butter to combine. Immediately pour the pb mixture over the popcorn and, working quickly, toss to coat completely.
- Pour the coated PB popcorn mixture onto the wax paper in an even layer. Allow the mixture to set about 10 minutes.
- Next, melt the chocolate candy until smooth. Drizzle copiously over the popcorn. Allow the mixture to set, about 15 minutes at room temperature. While the popcorn is setting, pour about 1/2 cup of powdered sugar into a large paper bag or resealable plastic bag (gallon size). Place handfuls of the popcorn mixture into the powdered sugar bag, seal, and vigorously shake for about a minute until the popcorn mixture has been completely coated with powdered sugar. Repeat if needed.
- Store the puppy chow popcorn in an airtight container for several days.
This is definitely a decadent popcorn mix that’s sure to please your friends and family! The Oreos and peanut butter cups surely send this popcorn over the top, but it’s worth every calorie 🙂 Enjoy!
Happy Tuesday!
xo, Hayley
Tanya Schroeder says
Ugh, I hate getting inside the turkey, yuck! My least favorite thing about cooking turkeys. I cannot wash my hands (and arms) enough afterwards!!!! I do like the idea of using popcorn instead of cereal! That is genius!!! Good luck with real dinner this year! And I don’t understand boxed potatoes. That just doesn’t make sense.
The Witch's Kitchen says
I still have to make puppy chow popcorn. It’s been on my “to do” list for a couple weeks now!
I make turkey all the time around here so it’s old hat to me. These boys eat it down to the carcass and look for more!
Sommer Collier (@SpicyPerspectiv) says
I would totally stuff that bowl bowl of popcorn right in my face!
cookingactress says
This is why I have yet to tackle a whole turkey or chicken….I am so scared of getting all that gunk out….
On a completely unrelated note: OMG OMG OMG THIS POPCORN/PUPPY CHOW YUMMINESS LOOKS SOOOOOOOOOO GOOD!
bakerbynature says
Where do I sign up to get a giant bowl of this to the face?! Pleeeeeeeease!
Erin @ The Spiffy Cookie says
Ooo combing those two together is awesome
carrian says
STOP IT!!! You’re making too much yummy stuff lately! Blast, I’m totally screwed this holiday season. My list of goodies to make is getting so long! Still love you though. If you were here we could snack together.
The Domestic Rebel says
Carrian, that’d be awesome!! And I am so scared of my Christmas make-list right now.. it’s about four pages long lol. Thank you!!
BruCrew Life says
That is definitely THE worst part of roasting a turkey! Why do they even bother putting them back in the turkey because I just throw it all away anyway!!! At least you made it through and had a yummy dinner right? Or at least a whole bowlful of this dangerous munch to calm your nerves?
crazyforcrust says
Worst part of turkey, hands down. (Pun intended!) Sometimes they put them in a handy little bag, which I like. Easy to find! And, I want to eat this puppy chow for Christmas. Is that a problem?
Anna @ Crunchy Creamy Sweet says
You are hilarious, Hayley! You have me laughing loud! And yay for popcorns! I made mine with just chocolate drizzle but this: cookies and cream, reese’s cups – oh my! Need to try it ASAP!
erika says
This looks sooooooo amazing. We just made plain old puppy chow for our cookie swap this past weekend, but now I’m wishing we’d made this! Good luck with your turkey!!
Karly Campbell says
And this is why I can never host Thanksgiving. Ugh.
That said, I have done this to a chicken before. I like to stick my hand in a plastic baggy before jamming it up the butt. Sort of makes me feel like a doctor, gloving up before the big procedure.
ashley says
I had the same problem with de-gibleting and de-necking the turkey this year! I asked my hubby to do it, thinking he’d dig right in with no problem – he ran out of the kitchen and said “i’m not going near that thing!”. I think I cried. GROSS.
I’ve never made puppy chow believe it or not – time to change that!!!
Carrie says
that’s so weird that you had such a hard time with the giblets and neck! lol. i can just imagine you freaking out with your arm up the turkey lol..
i know a few people who would die over this popcorn. what an awesome combination!
Ashley @ Kitchen Meets Girl says
LOL. I always make my husband dig that stuff out of the bird! 🙂 And yeah…this pretty much looks like the best popcorn ever!
Mercedes Porter says
Your turkey story is hilarious! And this popcorn looks phenomenal!
Jessica@AKitchenAddiction says
I know where I’m eating Christmas dinner! Especially if there is this puppy chow popcorn!
Back for Seconds says
Ok, I don’t think I can eat turkey for awhile now. I am both hysterically laughing and cringing! I need this popcorn ASAP, You know how I feel about puppy chow. I love the photo where it’s snowing sugar – so cool!