After meeting with a friend recently, I went shopping.
It was an accidental shopping trip as I was supposed to JUST visit with her, despite our location at the mall, and I did do that, but dangit, I parked right next to Forever 21 and it would be like, so wrong for me to walk by and never say hi to the necklaces.
So I did.
And proceeded to go on a polka dot rampage.
I realized this in the dressing room when I had ten items, all of which adorned polka dots. And one of those items were harem pants.
Now, I have been unsure about harem pants. They’re kind of confusing to wear and really intimidating (must be that five-foot of additional fabric right in the crotchetal area), but they were polka dot, and they were surprisingly cute, and I thought, why not try them on? Maybe I’ll look instantly chic and they’ll be all magical and whatnot.
So I tried on my polka dot ensemble, looking very much like a clown with the wide variety of spotted clothing in my dressing room, and pulled on the harem pants, ready to be wowed.
Lemme tell you. Harem pants are like, the new diet. Wanna know why? Because somewhere in them, there’s like, an instant muffin top eater. It eats your muffin top. Seriously!! Muffasaurus Rex was nowhere to be seen and I was feeling fine and dandy until…
Until I realized it looked like I was a genie clown wearing a diaper.
Or had a very long crotchetal area.
I wasn’t sure which one of the two was worse, as both a diaper-wearing genie clown and having an additional yard of fabric in that region were both cumbersome. Sure, Muffasaurus Rex was gone, but did I really want to look like a genie, or *shudder* a genie with a crotchetal problem? Methinks not.
So I gave up the diaper look and the polka dots and spent $80 on some other stuff.
Moral of the story? If you’re desperate to hide your muffin top, consider harem pants. Sure, you may look like you’re wearing adult diapers, but at least you and your spacious area will look trendy and chic. Unless you’re one of those people who can pull off any look, questionable or otherwise, then I hate you.
Enough about harem pants. They certainly weren’t magical and no carpets started flying, so I moved on to something that was magical. Strawberry Milk Donuts. Now, I know some people dislike strawberry milk (who are you, an alien!?) but I happen to be a fan of it and prefer it over chocolate milk. There’s something about it that I love and I wanted to recreate it into a breakfast staple ’round these parts: Donuts!
Strawberry Milk Donuts *adapted from the Twice-Glazed Funfetti Cake Donuts recipe
2 & 3/4 cups strawberry cake mix
3/4 cup buttermilk
2 Tbsp melted butter
Strawberry milk glaze (recipe + ingredients follow)
1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. Liberally grease a 6-cavity donut pan with cooking spray and set aside.
2. In a large bowl, combine cake mix, buttermilk, eggs and butter and stir until combined and batter is free of lumps.
3. Pour batter carefully into a gallon-size resealable bag, seal out the air, and snip off a tip in one corner. Pipe the batter into the cavities, filling about 2/3-3/4 full. Bake for approx. 7-9 minutes or until the tops spring back lightly when touched. Cool in the pan for about 5 minutes, then gently shake and invert over a wire rack to release donuts & cool completely.
Strawberry Milk Glaze
2 cups powdered sugar
1/2 pkt Duncan Hines Strawberry Shortcake Recipe Creations mix
2-3 Tbsp milk
1. In a small bowl, combine above ingredients until thick. Add more milk if needed; you want the icing to be a thick glaze consistency, not runny.
2. Dip the tops of the cooled donuts into the glaze; allow excess to drip off. Sprinkle immediately with rainbow sprinkles. Allow glaze to set, about 15 minutes.
3. Best served the same day, but feel free to store at room temperature in a paper bag for about 1 day.
PS–do you LOVE that donut dish towel as much as I do? Hope so, ’cause I bought an extra to give away in a future post, so stay tuned! xo.