It first started with my infatuation/fright of Forensic Files and that risk of seeing blurry, sepia-toned crime scene photos. And then it developed into a weird fascination with bruises.
And now, it’s watching Botched while eating Funfetti Cinnamon Rolls. Because let’s face it: while everyone else in Beverly Hills is getting fat sucked out, it’s only right for me to put fat in. Yes?
For some reason, eating and talking about or seeing gross things has never been a problem for me. Sometimes I’ll plop myself down in front of the TV and watch some graphic crime show or Botched (where, if we’re honest, sometimes those fake-plastic surgery faces are often scarier than blood and guts) and go to town on my plate of spaghetti while everyone gets butchered up. Meanwhile, my family can’t so much hear the shows, even if they’re in the other room. At the mere mention of “scalpel” or “blood” they cringe and ask me to turn it to Food Network. Weirdos.
Anywho — this recipe. It’s based off of the One-Hour Cinnamon Rolls I made a couple months back that are ohmygodsoawesome. They’re your standard cinnamon roll: extremely soft and fluffy sweet dough wrapped around a perfectly spiced, gooey brown sugary center and are topped with a scrumptiously sweet icing, made in under 60 minutes. But these rolls, while made very similarly, taste strikingly close to a gooey, cake battery cupcake. There’s Funfetti cake mix inside of the sweet dough, lending the dough that cake battery swirled goodness. And the filling is composed of buttery brown sugar and Funfetti cake mix, giving it a nice cupcake-y crunch.
If cake batter’s your jam (and why wouldn’t it be?!) these cinnamon rolls are a must-make. Sweet, chewy, sprinkly and gooey, they’re definitely the right way to celebrate eating breakfast!
*adapted from my One-Hour Best Cinnamon Rolls
- ¼ cup unsalted butter
- 1 cup milk (I used 1%)
- 1 pkt instant yeast
- 2 cups Funfetti cake mix (the powdered mix)
- 1 & ¾ cups all-purpose flour, divided
- 1 egg
- ½ tsp salt
- FOR FILLING:
- 3 Tbsp butter, very soft
- ½ cup brown sugar
- ½ cup Funfetti cake mix (the powdered mix)
- ½ tsp cinnamon
- FOR GLAZE:
- 2 cups powdered sugar
- 2 Tbsp milk
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- In a microwave-safe bowl, combine the butter and the milk. Microwave on HIGH for 1 minute. Stir the mixture, then continue to microwave the mixture in 20 second intervals until the butter has melted and the mixture is warm, not hot. It should feel like lukewarm bath water -- if the mixture is too hot, set it aside to cool off for a minute or two.
- Pour the warm milk mixture and the yeast into the bowl of a stand mixer; whisk it for a couple seconds to combine. Using the dough hook attachment, turn the machine onto medium-low speed and begin adding the Funfetti cake mix, 1 &1/2 cups flour, salt and egg. Beat to combine on medium-low speed, or until the mixture appears to be coming together into a ball. If the mixture is still sticking on the sides of the bowl, beat in the remaining ¼ cup of flour as needed until the mixture begins to come together. Beat the mixture for 5 minutes on medium-low speed. Remove the dough hook and place a damp cloth over the dough bowl to rest for 10 minutes.
- Sprinkle a flat work space with some flour and flour a rolling pin. Roll the dough out into a rectangular shape at an even thickness (I like making mine about ¼-1/2" thick. Spread the surface of the dough with the very soft butter. Meanwhile, in a smaller bowl, combine the brown sugar, remaining Funfetti cake mix and the cinnamon with a fork to blend. Sprinkle this filling mixture copiously over the buttered plane of dough and gently pat it with your hands to adhere.
- Starting with the longest side closest to you, begin rolling the dough tightly into a log shape away from you. Pinch the final seam to seal the log of dough together. Using a very sharp knife of unflavored dental floss (which I used here and prefer), slice the doughy ends off of the roll and discard, then begin slicing the rolls into equal sized pieces; you should end up with around 12 rolls, or less rolls if you prefer them larger. Place the rolls into greased 9" cake pans with about 1" apart from one another.
- Cover the pans with damp towels and place them on your oven range. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F. Allow the rolls to proof for about 25 minutes or until they've risen some.
- Finally, bake the rolls for approx. 15-20 minutes or until they're golden brown and puffy. Remove from the oven and let cool for about 15 minutes. While they cool, make your glaze: in a small bowl, whisk together the powdered sugar, milk and vanilla extract until a thick but pourable glaze is achieved, adding more milk if mixture is too thick. Douse the rolls with the glaze and top immediately with rainbow sprinkles. These are best served warm!
- **To cut the rolls with dental floss, gently slide a piece of floss underneath the log of dough, holding each end of floss in each hand. Criss-cross the floss over the dough, effortlessly slicing through the dough.**
I seriously love how thick, fat and sweet these adorable, sprinkly rolls are! Jam-packed with that sweet vanilla cake battery punch we all crave and topped with that sinful, thick glaze that all cinnamon rolls need and deserve. Heaven on a plate!
Have a fantastical day!!