I have offensive taste in music.
Not offensive like “yo yo yo, apple bottom jeans and gang bangin’ shootin’ this and that raps” or UGH– “tractor-ridin’, wheat-pickin’, missin’ my rodeo giiiiiirl” stuff, either.
Like, I listen to THE SAME stuff over and over and over.
And it drives all my passengers insane.
I was never the girl who discovered new music. I always waited until the radio force-fed it to me or other people forced me to listen to it on their MySpace pages or in their cars. I never went searching for new bands. I never paid attention to iTunes recommendations. I never even listened to friends’ recommendations.
New music freaks me out.
I don’t like not knowing what’s coming up next, you know?
My music taste is offensive because it’s so damn annoying and overplayed. Seriously. There’s only so many times a girl can listen to “Hollaback Girl” on repeat before I want to drive off a bridge.
And I rotate the same eight or so mix CDs in my car to the point where I have every song on every CD memorized. And I have my favorites on each one, of course. Some of the CDs are from the eighth grade. Ugh.
Jessie made me a Valentine’s CD last year and I’ve only listened to about six of the twenty-something songs. I’m just not emotionally ready to commit to the other eighteen songs yet. It’s been A YEAR.
And when he made me a Valentine’s mix this year, I admit–I’ve only listened to one song, and it was one I knew.
I’m so awful. Someone please make me a better human.
I’ve tried listening to my brother’s taste in music because he’s really open-minded and it’s ever-changing… but the newness of it all gets me. I’ll stick with my three Red Hot Chili Peppers songs, thank you.
And the radio? Atrocious! I have to listen to a classic rock station at work every day and their song selections make me want to jab myself in the throat with a plastic knife. If I didn’t know any better, The Beatles’ only song would be “Come Together.” The radio is terrible!
So basically, my “roots” of growing up listening to Led Zeppelin, Oingo Boingo, The Beatles, The Who, The Stones, The Smiths, & the like has been tarnished by radio.
I’ve resulted to searching down rap songs in my car just to have some contrast. And I don’t do rap songs well.
I like some rap–I really do. The beat is good for dancing and sometimes, admittedly, it puts me in a confident mood. I can envision myself strutting all sexy-like into a room to the song and being like “heyyyyy” all cool-like and it makes me feel good.
(I’m also a major dork. Thanks)
But when I listen to rap in the car, I’m reallllly cautious. I never listen to rap with the windows down because, uh, that’s embarrassing. I’m scared passersby will judge me for blasting Lil Wayne. And I NEVER blast rap around teenagers. Teenagers are super judge-y. They’ll probably point and laugh and say “that lady is trying to be all cool, listening to Lil Jon” and I’ll cry because I’m now too old to listen to rap.
I may as well listen to elevator music. It’s my only savior.
That, and eating my sorrows in ice cream. Preferably the cake-flavored kind, because then I can feel young at heart and delve into the comforts of birthday cake. Birthday cake doesn’t force me to listen to new, scary music. Birthday cake doesn’t judge me for liking songs that talk about “goose got me loose.” Birthday cake just loves and hugs and whispers sweet serenades.
Birthday Cake Ice Cream. It’s to die for, people. TO DIE FOR!! So rich and creamy and sweet and positively scrumptious. It’s Funfetti cake flavored with vanilla icing swirls and a healthy smattering of sprinkles all up in yo’ face. It’s perfect. And it should be in yo’ belly. Yo, yo, yo!
2 cups cold heavy whipping cream
1 (7 oz) can sweetened condensed milk
About 1 cup Funfetti cake mix (just the dry mix–NOT batter)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 can vanilla frosting or about 1 heaping cup prepared vanilla buttercream
Blue food coloring
Sprinkles–and lots of ’em
1. In the bowl of your stand mixer, beat the whipping cream until stiff peaks form, about 5 minutes on HIGH. While that’s mixing, add a couple drops of teal or blue food coloring to the frosting and stir to blend. Set aside.
2. Gently fold in the sweetened condensed milk, the cake mix and vanilla into the whipping cream until blended, careful not to deflate or over-mix the whipping cream. Lightly stir in the frosting and sprinkles, just to move the frosting about but not mixing too heavily.
3. Pour the ice cream mixture into an airtight container. Seal tightly and freeze for approx. 8 hours or until solid & frozen. Serve up with extra sprinkles, whipped cream and chocolate sauce if you like, or go “naked.”
Seriously. I cannot emphasize how amazing this truly is. You really need to make some. The frosting swirls are unexpected and sweet, and the cake batter flavor packs a serrrrious punch with the lovely crunch from the sprinkles. It’s just… omg. Perfect.
I hope you have a wonderful Monday!