Cause hello? That hurts.
Toes are extremely sensitive about things crushing them.
That’s why I refuse to wear sandals.
That, and they’re ugly.
I own zero pairs of sandals. I shudder just thinking about them.
Flip-flops especially. Can you say ‘tacky’?
I get they’re comfortable, but really? No. They’re only okay for the pool, water-parks, and a quick shoe to run to the woods for a potty break during camping.
Mall shopping, school-going, work-going, and anything else requires real shoes.
Now that my rant is finished, what I meant originally by ‘toes’ was really a metaphor for people.
People don’t like when you rain on their parade, even though I’m quite fond of rain.
…Must be the summertime people.
Anyways, when someone’s good at something, they want to be the best at it, too.
Like, Kim Kardashian wants to continue to be the best at not doing anything. That’s why she somehow got rid of Paris Hilton and we haven’t heard from her for a long time.
In fact, because Paris’ not-doing-anything reign was stolen by Kim K, Paris is actually probably doing something now.
Or that Apple wants to be the best computer maker in the world. While I really like my new iPhone 3G, I don’t like that I have to scroll all the way at the top of my texts to call someone. Or that my texts aren’t time-stamped.
It’s hard to pretend not to be a stalker when you can’t see the last time you sent them a text. I don’t want to appear too desperate, but c’mon, it’s hard when I can’t tell if I sent that text five minutes ago or ten.
And then, if you’re a West Coasty, there’s In N Out Burger. They’re seriously the best–no contest.
While some will gripe (and I do not care to know who you are) about their food (you can’t please everyone), 99.67% of Californians are obsessed with In N Out.
If you don’t know, my fellow out-of-state friends, In N Out’s like a legacy on the West Coast. You’ve probably heard of it, and maybe even held a personal vendetta against Californians for our regular access to their mouthwatering burgers, crispy fries and thick shakes, but seriously, we can’t help that the Golden State rules.
(I promise I’m not being endorsed by In N Out).
My favorite thing? Their animal-style fries.
It’s not on the official menu, but rather a participant on the “secret” menu… one that’s not so secret anymore. Animal-style fries take their already-awesome fries to a whole new level, adding their yummy spread, grilled onions and melt-y cheese on top.
Sounds fattening? I don’t care. I could eat buckets of the stuff.
And while the price remains relatively cheap, I still can’t grant myself animal-fry access every time I desire. Then I’d be 5,000 pounds, Jessie would dump me, and I would be on My Strange Addiction because I would live in a world full of animal-style fries. And people would judge me. I can’t let my world come to this.
So it’s a small, occasional indulgence.
But then I realized I had (almost) all the necessary ingredients to make these bad-ass fries at home. So I did. And now you can, too.
While they aren’t exactly the same melt-in-your-mouth side as In N Out, they are pretty damn satisfying.
Don’t worry, I’m not stepping on In N Out’s toes. They wear steel-toed boots, anyway.
1 cup frozen French fries (I used Ore Ida)
3 Tablespoons bottled light Thousand Island dressing
3 Tablespoons caramelized onions (made ahead)
2 slices American cheese
1. Prepare fries according to package directions. Once crisp and baked, scoot all the fries together in one pile on baking sheet.
2. Cut cheese slices in half and place all around the fries, trying to coat a bunch. Pop back into the oven for another 2 minutes or until cheese is melted and bubbly. Remove from oven and set aside.
3. Place fries into a bowl or plate and top with the salad dressing and the caramelized onions. I didn’t have onions on me, so mine was without–but if you want to, caramelize some onion strips in a lightly greased skillet for about 10-15 minutes or until tender and dark golden.
They may have created themselves a legacy… but that doesn’t mean you can’t get in on the awesomeness, too.
Enjoy these, they rock!!
And if you work for In N Out, hire me to do endorsements.