Things You Will Never Hear Me Say:
“This is too bright.”
“There’s such a thing as too much glitter.”
“On second thought, I’ll pass; I don’t need it.”
“No, I don’t feel like going to the mall today.”
“I could never spend that much on a Betsey Johnson dress.”
“This floor-length denim skirt looks GREAT!!!”
“Mom, will you buy me a pair of Crocs?”
“I’ve been craving a Bloody Mary!!”
“Kristen Stewart is one of the greatest actresses of this or any generation. Pure talent and pizzazz.”
…Or any sentence where I use the word ‘pizzazz.’
“I don’t want pizza tonight.”
“Let’s go to Old Navy–I hear they’re having a sale on flip flops!!!”
“That Taylor Swift is such a hopeless romantic! I love her songs, and no, they don’t all sound the same!”
“Ooh, John Mayer. He’s SOOOOO hot!”
“Are seven layers too much?”
So, okay, not to sound like a broken record or anything, but I heart seven layer bars. Like a lot. And not to be a one-trick pony or anything, but I made yet another version that tastes like cupcakes. You’ll thank me after your taste buds explode into the gates of heaven upon first bite, trust me. (Also trust me not to use anymore cliche expressions related to broken-record-playing-track-ponies).
The inspiration for these big, bad bars full of birthday cake goodliness came from THESE bars I made last week. Upon tasting them, I liked them, but I felt like they were missing some more cake-y action. And sweetened condensed milk, which I’m petitioning restaurants to start offering as a beverage. The world is so narrow-minded in its beverage choices, am I right?
So thus, these Birthday Cake Seven Layer Bars were born. Magic bars, seven layer bars, crack — whatever you prefer to call them, we’ll all inevitably know what you’re talking about when you bite into one and say “OMG YUM.”
1 box Funfetti cake mix
1/2 cup melted butter
1/2 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
1/2 cup white chocolate chips
1/2 cup sprinkles
3/4 cup miniature marshmallows
1/2 cup (roughly about 10-12) Birthday Cake Golden Oreos, roughly crushed
1/2 cup (roughly about 10-12) Birthday Cake Oreos, roughly crushed
2 boxes Cupcake Bites*
1 (14 oz) can sweetened condensed milk
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Line a 13×9 inch pan with foil, extending edges of foil over the sides of the pan. Mist lightly with cooking spray.
2. In a large bowl, combine the cake mix, egg and melted butter until a soft dough forms. Press into prepared pan in an even layer, and bake for approx. 10 minutes.
3. Remove from oven and immediately top with the semi-sweet chips, the white chips, sprinkles, 2 types of crushed Oreos, cupcake bites and marshmallows evenly. *However, I find the marshmallows cook best when they’re put on as the first layer, then covered with the remaining ingredients* Drizzle the can of scmilk on top.
4. Return to the oven and continue to bake for 15-20 minutes or until the top is bubbly and golden. Allow to cool to room temperature before cutting into bars. Store airtight, at room temperature, for several days. These taste really good at room temperature or slightly warmed! So gooey!
**Note: I found the Cupcake Bites (which are like round, cake-flavored candies) at the Dollar Store. I also found the limited edition Birthday Cake Oreos at Walmart and Target. Stock up!!**
These bars are OUTRAGEOUS. So many deliciously sweet flavors happening at once. The gooey marshmallows, the sugary sprinkles, the crunchy Oreos .. everything works cohesively to make a stunningly simple, stickily sweet cake batter bar. You and your kids will love it!