Recently, I bartered with my coworker. I would burn her a CD if she lent me her old N*Sync No Strings Attached CD to feed my seemingly-unquenchable thirst for early 2000′s nostalgia.
Two weeks later and I’m still (shamelessly) blasting No Strings Attached in my car like it’s going out of style. However, I remember the entire CD being super rad and was depressed to realize I’ve been skipping over the lamer tunes in favor for my five faves. So I decided I’d bring back the 2000′s and break down this boy band puppet show song-by-song, for your reading (and hopefully listening) pleasure.
Bye Bye Bye. Okay, this is a classic. The radio had it right for a reason. This is their jam. Don’t you dare lie to JT no mo’.. it ain’t no lie, baby. He’s dumping your ass and nevah evah forgiving you. I kinda wish this tune would blast every time I broke up with someone.
It’s Gonna Be Me. This song reiterates the importance of enunciating words. Every time I hear this poppy ballad, I can’t help but hear my sweet Justin say “it’s gonna be May” and it makes me think of all the wonderful things that will happen in May. Mother’s Day, my friend’s birthday, my mom’s birthday, spring, May…
Space Cowboy. Too many “yippee-ay-yay”ing and JC Chasez opens the song with “here it comes, millennium” which makes me feel, well, old.
Just Got Paid. The worst track on this stupid album. I just imagine them being rained on by hundred dollar bills and then the money would get stuck on Justin’s top-ramen-esque hair because HOW COULD IT NOT? THE MAN HAS A HEAD OF TOP RAMEN.
It Makes Me Ill. Okay, I’ll say it. I feel bad for the other guys of N*Sync. You know.. the ones who aren’t Justin Timberlake or JC. We all know the truth: JT and JC totally held N*Sync up. The others were merely pathetic pawns in Justin and JC’s quest for world domination. JC somehow died off along the way and now Justin is like, super successful and awesome and no one bothers to bring up N*Sync anymore because they’re like “yeah whatever, you’re cool bro. You don’t need to bring up your embarrassing past. We all did stupid things.” Meanwhile, the other guys probably STILL have to mention “that one time when I was in N*Sync doing random backup singing and choreographed dancing” because otherwise NO ONE WOULD REMEMBER THEM. Like the guy with the cornrows (his name is Chris Kirkpatrick.. did you even know that? My point exactly). Everyone just feels bad for him because no one ever heard his voice and we all just chuckled awkwardly when he swung his cornrows around like a badass. I mean, cornrows. How tacky. Makes me ill, brah.
This I Promise You. If you don’t find this a romantical love ballad, you’re probably dead inside.
No Strings Attached. I don’t even care the amount of hate mail I may receive.. this is THE best track on the album, hands-down. Baby, you don’t have to be afraid to fall in love.
Digital Get Down. This song seriously makes me lol. Also, much like Space Cowboy’s intro to the Y2K, this song has a dial-up tone in it. My sister didn’t know what those “weird noises were with the robot lady talking over it” and I had to explain that, back in the olden days when people wore slap bracelets and Justin Beiber was still a nobody, folks had to connect to the Internet via a strenuous, painful process which resulted in lots of loud internet-y noises and a long-ass time of waiting before you could even access your AOL Instant Messenger which was like, totally lame since I wanted to update my profile 234986257 times a day. And after my explanation, I felt old.
Bring In the Noise. Gawwwd. What an ultimate party ballad. Let’s get loose, y’all.
I don’t know the last three songs because they suck. The end.
I made peppermint ice cream. With pieces of peppermint bark in it. It rocked my face off while I listened to N*Sync all day (have you seen my life? I need to find it ASAP).
2 cups heavy whipping cream
1 (14 oz) can sweetened condensed milk
2 pkts Duncan Hines Peppermint Frosting Creations
2 bars Ghiradelli peppermint bark, roughly chopped
About 1 cup coarsely crushed candy canes
1. In the bowl of a stand mixer, beat the heavy whipping cream on medium-high speed until whipped and stiff peaks form (about 5 minutes).
2. Add the sweetened condensed milk and both packets of the peppermint Frosting Creations flavor and very gently, fold the scmilk and peppermint packets into the whipped cream to combine.
3. Once combined, very lightly fold in the chopped peppermint bark and crushed candy canes. Pour the mixture into a large, airtight container and freeze for at least 6 hours before serving.
This peppermint bark ice cream is SO simple, yet SO delicious. Peppermint is easily one of my favorite ice cream flavors and for good reason–it’s refreshingly minty and I LOVE the hint of the crunchy candy cane pieces and the creamy chunks of peppermint bark. It’s perfect by itself or in a sundae with chocolate syrup!
Enjoy! Happy Thursday!