I’ve always been a big fan of eye makeup.
I’ve (unapologetically) spent lots of money on fancy designer eyeshadows in bright colors because I’m Urban Decay’s biggest freakin’ fan and can’t resist their shadow boxes. It’s this weird phenomenon where $50 just happens to fly out of my wallet and into ULTA’s cash register whenever they release a new palette.
And I used to have this psychotic infatuation with turquoise eye shadow in the 9th grade. Yeeeeeah. I’m sure there are some skin-crawling, humiliating pictures lurking in some dark, shameful corner of my computer hard drive with that turquoise shadow painted way up to my eyebrows.
Thank goodness no one takes 9th grade seriously.
Up until recently, the only “eyebrow work” I would participate in were rogue waxes and just regular maintenance. I didn’t blink a heavily mascara’d eye to even use eyebrow makeup because I already have generously thick brows as it is.
But then one day I was feeling particularly adventurous and decided I’d fix up my eyebrows with some pencil. I used my regular brown eyeliner because why the hell not and got all feather-stroke-y all up in my brows. They looked darker and more severe, but I kind of liked it, so I played along.
However, the problem with randomly trying out new beauty tricks is that I’m unsure of how they’ll react later in the day… or how, you know, I would completely forget I was wearing eyeliner on my eyebrows and how I just decided to swipe my eyebrow in a violent fashion, resulting in this weird, slightly askew fake-eyebrow/brown smudge arcing across my forehead, leaping skyward as if to say to the beauty gods, I have no idea what I’m doing, hence this poo-colored smear above my left eyebrow. Help me.
Especially when said incident occurred in public. After a session with my counselor, for which my face was already kinda splotchy because I got a little emotional, so now I looked like a crying buffoon with a weird poo-smear on my face, like some creature of the night lurking rabidly in daylight, desperate for perfectly penciled in brows.
It was great.
Anyway. Eyeballs. They’re kinda gross, aren’t they? So when Dorothy and I teamed up for an eyeball day, I knew I had to keep with the gross theme. You know, for people who are into that kinda thing. Just call me flexible.
These truffles are totes grody. They’re white-chocolate-covered cherry cordial candies with Airhead irises and mini brown M&M pupils. And when you bite into them, you get a nice creepy surprise. A la scary eyebrow style, but grosser
Eyeball Truffles *inspired by Kristan’s recipe
1 pkg chocolate covered cherry cordials
1/2 pkg white chocolate almond bark (such as Candiquik)
2 pkg Airheads in blue raspberry or Tutti Fruitti (blue and teal)
Mini brown M&M’s
Red food coloring
1. Line a cookie sheet with foil; set aside. In a large bowl, prepare the candy bark according to package directions until smooth and melted.
2. Dip each cordial one at a time until completely submerged. Remove carefully with a fork, allowing excess to drip off. Return to the foil lined baking sheet and repeat. Freeze the truffles to set the chocolate, about 10 minutes.
3. While the truffles are setting, get your irises ready. Using a small, sharp paring knife, carefully(!!) cut small circles out of the Airheads and round the edges with your fingertips, if needed. Set aside.
4. Gently press an Airhead “iris” on the dome of the eyeball truffle. Using a dab of candy melt, attach the brown mini M&M “pupil” on top of the iris, letting it set.
5. Soak the tip of a toothpick in some red liquid food coloring and draw veins on the sides of the eyeballs. Let set, about 15 minutes, then serve! These would be so creepy to give out as goody bag treats for parties or Halloween!!