While I love Halloween, I have some qualms with Halloween costumes.
Who decided it was brilliant for females to wear skirts that just barely cover our lady bits?! Fo realz, I am blushing admitting this, but I’ve got undergarments longer than most women’s Halloween costumes.
That ain’t okay, y’all. I mean, I’m not Amish.
I’m no prude, but come on. Alice in Wonderland is totally cute and then Halloween people had to turn her into some Wonderland hooker. What gives?
I remember one year I was desperate to be Alice and my dad took me costume shopping. Granted, I was a teenager and all my friends had already gotten their loin cloth costumes and were taking pictures and posting them all over MySpace.
The costume place had two Alice costumes: the traditional, real-deal version with a dress and apron practically to my ankles, and the hooker version, complete with a garter belt. Of course I couldn’t get away with having my dad buy me the latter version, so I got the practically Amish-Alice…
…and was probably the least coolest trick or treater but whatever. I stayed warm! And my buttcheeks weren’t hanging out. And really, isn’t that a highlight to this story? Warm, covered buttcheeks? I think so.
I just don’t understand why my options are limited to frumpy, prudish, Amish dress or street-walker. Can’t we like, meet in the middle??
Also, whyyyy are Halloween costumes so expensive? I need to get into the business of making tacky, slutty Halloween costumes because people spend waaayy too much money on that stuff every year.
This year I’m being Where’s Waldo because I already have the glasses and own a red & white striped shirt. I guess it’s a sign I’m getting older that I no longer want to wear cute little costumes with my friends and show the world my butt. It’s like, a wise-person thing.
Anyway, Halloween isn’t just about crazy-short costumes but about creepy things, like these fun Witches Stew Cookies. They’re dark chocolate & mint chip cookies topped with a creepy-cool Cadbury “Scream” Egg that’s been halved and filled with tons of gross stuff like bones, bugs and eyeballs.
1 box dark chocolate fudge cake mix
1/2 cup oil
3/4 cup dark chocolate & mint baking chips
About 12 Cadbury “scream” eggs, halved
Assorted sprinkles (I used bones, eyeballs, and jumbo bugs)
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Lightly grease two cookie sheets with cooking spray. Set aside. Meanwhile, gently press the sprinkles into the halved eggs.
2. In a large bowl, combine the cake mix, eggs, oil and baking chips with a wooden spoon until blended. Scoop into Tablespoon-sized balls and place 1″ apart on the baking sheets.
3. Bake for approx. 7-8 minutes, rotating pans halfway through bake time to ensure even baking. Cookies will just barely be set in the middle. Remove from the oven and gently press each egg cup into the center of each still-warm cookie. Allow the cookies to set on the baking sheet about 5-10 minutes before carefully transferring to a wire rack to finish cooling completely.
These cookies are totally spooky-cool! I bet your kids will enjoy decorating the “witches stew” and topping these hot cookies with the fun cauldron they’re totally cute and some of my favorites! Plus, who can resist that oozy green filling?