Can you believe Valentine’s Day is right around the corner?
I mean, before we get too ahead of ourselves, we have to celebrate the new national holiday, aka Hayley’s 21st Birthday, which occurs on January 24. Then Valentine’s Day can commence and all that jazz.
But I understand that some people haven’t quite received the whole new-national-holiday memo yet and therefore are flooding Walmart in colors of pink and red. It’s cool. Pink’s my fave color and red’s kinda sexy. We worked it out.
And I’m becoming a big Valentine’s person now, probably because this year I have a Valentine worthy of my personal Valentine. In years past I’ve doled out Tootsie Pops and things to previous Valentines who sucked. And one year I got pink eye on Valentine’s Day which kind of makes the color pink horrifying rather than adorable and loving.
Now I love me some V-Day. Chocolates, cards, FLOWERS!! and over-the-top romantic swoonage? Count me super-in.
However, some people will never have a Valentine. Harsh? Yes. But bear with me.
There’s this girl–I’ll call her Whiny Winnie–who is CONSTANTLY bombarding my Facebook newsfeed with THE. WHINIEST. CRAP. EVER.
It’s like she was whooshed out of her mother’s hoo-ha already complaining about the hospital room’s temperature and how she’s destined for a life of ultimate loneliness.
Like, helllooo downer.
Whiny Winnie has had a total of 6 boyfriends or so in the past year and falls in love with each one after about one week of knowing one another, putting a true damper on the whole “love at first sight” notion since every guy she sees, she loves, and every guy she loves, leaves her.
Sad? Eh, not really.
You see, Whiny Winnie isn’t a nice girl who picks dud dudes and suddenly finds “The One” while sharing a fateful taxi cab one rainy night with a Ryan Gosling-lookalike. Nope.
Whiny Winnie does it all to herself. By, you guessed it, incessant whining.
Pretty much, her statuses look like this:
“Just met the greatest guy EVER. He’s totally the love of my life and I WILL marry him one day. Future Mrs. ____? I think so.”
“Ohmigawd, ___ is SO great. He’s like, the best boyfriend EVARRRR.”
“…hates when SOME people can’t answer their cell phone. I can’t wait around forever.”
“Seriously? You think I like waiting around for you? You picked the wrong girl. Just my luck for picking a dud.”
“I am destined for a life of loneliness. I am meant to be alone. No one will ever love me.”
“I swear, life cannot get any worse. Today, I was picking my nose and my booger looked exactly like ____. It was awful. I sobbed into my booger finger for four hours. I am MI.SER.A.BLE.”
“Hahahahahahhaha I hate boys. They’re so dumb. Off to the club with my girls, loving life!!!!”
“I just met the hottest. guy. ever. Marriage soon?”
Mind you, this happens every day in the span of a week to several months. It’s horrendous.
The worst part is? I use Whiny Winnie as my personal drama-feed. As much as I hate her whiny, poor me-complaint statuses, I love them. Sometimes, I’ll read all her comments between her and her boyfriend fighting just so I can get a weird laugh.
I’m SICK, I tell you! SICK!
Anyways, moral of this story is unless she gets a boyfriend within the next three weeks she’s doomed to be alone on Valentine’s Day. So she better find the love of her life quick and she better not look here because we don’t have taxi cabs and there’s been no rain for months in Sacramento.
Whether or not you’re attached (or will be by V-Day; I am a month-plus ahead) you should still make these cookies. They’re Cherry Kiss Cookies and they’re divine beyond belief.
1 box cherry chip cake mix
1/2 cup oil
1/2 cup white chocolate chips
A couple drops hot pink food coloring or hot pink gel color
About 20-24 unwrapped dark chocolate & cherry swirl Dove heart-shaped chocolates (I found these in the seasonal candy aisle at my grocery store, but cherry cordial Kisses or chocolate hearts would work, too)
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Lightly grease two cookie sheets with cooking spray, then blot the excess with a paper towel. Set the sheets aside.
2. In a large bowl, mix together the cake mix, eggs, and oil with a rubber spatula until a soft dough forms. Stir in a couple drops of hot pink food coloring, or a knife’s tip of hot pink gel coloring into the dough until completely tinted. Stir in the white chocolate chips.
3. Portion dough into heaping Tablespoonfuls onto the greased cookie sheets, about 1-2″ apart. Bake for approximately 10-12 minutes, rotating pans halfway through cooktime to ensure even baking, until cookies are lightly golden and tops are set. Do not overbake.
4. Allow cookies to cool for about a minute or two before gently pressing an unwrapped chocolate heart in the center of each cookie. Let the cookies cool on sheets for another 5 minutes before carefully transferring to a wire rack to cool completely. The hearts will take awhile to harden so be wary of stacking or packing cookies until the chocolate has set (putting these in the fridge or freezer real quick will speed up the process). Store these airtight.
See? Totally compromising with Valentine’s Day.
By the way, have you entered my Birthday Giveaway yet? You should! I’m giving away lots of fun, free stuff!!
Have a wonderful Monday!
Linked to: Mingle Monday